Thursday, April 15, 2010

Big Boy Bed?

So I've been reading up on what Babywise has to say about moving your toddler from the crib to a big bed. I'm considering making this move with Austin this weekend. There are pros and cons to it, but my biggest motivation is that I hate the thought of loosing all of my guest beds! At least this way we will be able to keep the full bed for when my Mom comes to stay with us after the baby is born. I'm hoping that if we move forward with this that Austin will make the transition smoothly. But if we are going to do it we better do it now so that there is plenty of time to work out any issues before the new baby comes! Sooo..that MIGHT be my mission this weekend. Plus if I do that I get to buy new bedding for him which will be fun! LOL wish us luck!

what does Babywise say? this is from the Chronicles of a Babywise blog that i LOVE!


For many Babywise moms, the transition from a crib to a bed is much easier than they anticipated. That is how it was for us with Brayden. We moved Brayden from the crib to a twin size bed when he was 21 months old (but close to 22 months old). At the same time, he also moved to a new room. It was shortly before Kaitlyn was born, and I wanted him to be fully adjusted before Kaitlyn came along to sleep in the crib.

I was nervous. I didn't want him to get out of his bed and play instead of sleep. We moved him over, and things went smoothly. We had no problems. A Babywise child typically has little difficulty (relatively speaking) with this transition because he is trained to obedience. He is required to obey mommy all day, so why should night be any different? It isn't.

On Becoming Toddlerwise Tips
Toddlerwise talks about this transition starting on page 135. Here are some highlights:

Typically happens between ages 18-24 months.
The only thing that holds your child in bed to sleep is your word. There are no longer physical boundaries. Your word needs to be obeyed in the day if you want it to be obeyed at night.
Moving to a bed is a freedom. Be sure your child is ready for that freedom.
You can include your child in purchasing the new bed and the sheets etc. (although we didn't do this; we already had it all).
The child can help set up the bed and make the bed.
Do it on a night when Mom and Dad can both be there in the morning to make a big deal out of the transition.
Do not allow your child to get out of bed without your permission. Teach them to call to you when they want to get up.
Buy a side rail for the bed for your child's safety.

My Tips:

Be sure your child has something familiar to carry over to the new bed. You want to be clear that this new bed is where your child now sleeps. Brayden had a few stuffed animals that he slept with in his crib. He also had his blankie. I put those on his bed with him to sleep just like he had in his crib.
Have a naptime and bedtime routine. Singing a song, reading a story, etc. Whatever your routine is, it will help signal your child that it is now time for sleep. See this post for more: Sleep Routine: http://babywisemom.blogspot.com/2008/01/sleep-routine.html
Get a side rail for sure. This helped me feel much better about his safety in the night. I also put a pillow at the foot of his bed, and a pillow between the side rail and the pillow at the foot of the bed just to help have a boundary. He has never fallen out of bed (his bed is against a wall).
If you put the bed against a wall, you might need to roll up some blankets to put between the mattress and the wall if there is a gap.
I have said it before, but if you read stories, I recommend not reading them in the bed. We used to do that. Bedtime ended up being dragged out. Kids are very good at lengthening out the time of the bedtime routine. We read stories in a recliner--and we also have a predetermined number of stories that will be read.
Give lots of praise for obedience and show a lot of excitement over the transition. I know I was emotional, but I didn't show that to Brayden.




Staying in Bed

If your child gets out of bed after you instruct him not to, evaluate yourself and see if there are parenting gaps you need to correct.
When your child calls out to you, respond. You want to reward him for listening to you. I can see some kids calling out after a few minutes and declaring the nap over. Respond and inform him that naptime is not over yet, that he needs to sleep, etc.
Toddlerwise says to initially instruct your child to not get out of bed until you come get him. So how long is initially? Toddlerwise doesn't say. Brayden is almost three, and I still don't allow him to get out of bed until I come get him. I know Brayden and know that sleep is absolutely last on his list of priorities. If I allowed him to get out of bed on his own, I think he would get up and play with his toys instead of sleeping. Things might be different with Kaitlyn since she loves to sleep. For now, Brayden still stays in bed until I get him. I can see him moving in the direction of being ready to take that responsibility on himself, but he isn't ready yet. You will have to decide when your child is ready. Of course you want the day to come when your child gets up on his own. He needs to be completely ready to take a nap, then get up. Not lay for a while then get up and play.
What do you do if they get out? Brayden never did this until several months ago. He went about a year without ever getting out of his bed without permission. I went in and told him he needed to get in his bed. I then told him he needed to stay there until Mommy or Daddy came to get him. I then put him in his bed and left the room for a few minutes. I went back in and he was in his bed. I praised him for obeying and being a good boy and got him out (it was the end of his nap). This happened a couple of times (seemingly randomly). It seems to be fine now.
Whatever your rules will be for staying in bed, decide on them before you move your child over so you are ready if you are faced with your child getting out on his own.

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